You’ve heard the saying, “If a tree falls in the forest and no
one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?” Well, to be frank, I don’t get
into the woods nearly enough to care about the warning cries of lonely trees,
but here’s a question that made me stop and think this morning: “If something
happens in my life and I don’t post it to social media, does it still matter?”
Laugh all you want, but to me this is a real conundrum! I
mean, here I am playing with my kids; one of them does something hilarious and
I don’t think, “They are so cute. I’m so grateful to be their daddy.” No, the
first thought that flies through my overly publicized mind is, “Oh, I wish I
had taken a picture of that, so that everyone would know what cute, brilliant
kids I have.”(They are, in fact, both cute and brilliant, but that’s beside the
point.)
Or I go body surfing in the stillness of the morning,
sharing the waves with only the pelicans and a pod of dolphin. When a couple of
the dolphin steal the wave I was about to ride, my first thought isn’t, “How
amazing is this! I wonder if I could ride one” (though the thought did cross my
mind). No, I think, “man, I need to get a Go-Pro with a waterproof housing so I
can record this!”
Now, don’t get me wrong. I love social media and the way it
allows me to eavesdrop on my friends’ lives (or at least the sanitized,
glamorized parts of their lives that they choose to broadcast). And I love the
way that I can share moments from my life with my extended circles of family
and friends (especially the ones that make me look adventurous, romantic,
insightful and awesome). The point of this rant isn’t to critique the
shallowness of social media relationships, though that is an issue in our
already narcissistic, self-promoting culture. Rather, the point of this is to
confess that my desire to construct an epic social-media presence actually
hinders me from being present, truly present, with the flesh-and-blood people
right in front of me (primarily my wife and kids).
Most family holidays are consumed not by having deep,
meaningful conversations with my extended family. Rather, they are consumed by
getting that one shot of my boys and all their cousins looking into the camera
at the same time (we’ve long since given up trying to get them all to smile at
the same time. Heck, I can’t even get my two boys to do that, let alone a hoard
of two to five-year-olds). By the end of each family gathering, my wife and I
are left exhausted and frustrated, with the sneaking suspicion that we have once
again missed out on truly connecting with our extended family. But we do have a
bunch of pictures to show what a great time we had!
Methinks that my social-media life is getting in the way of
my real life. I have begun to exchange reality, with all its wonderfully mundane
moments, for some glamorized online facsimile. Because, let’s be honest, in
this day and age, it doesn’t really matter how much fun you had, or how
beautiful the sunset you shared with your spouse was, or how awesome your
children really are, unless you have at least 25 people who agree with you
through their “likes” and their comments. The more online feedback you get, the
better it must have been! Oh, the wonders of living life by committee.
Hit “like” or comment below if you agree (only then will I
know that my private musings matter). J
